Women are most fascinating between the ages of 35 and 40 after they have won a few races and know how to pace themselves. Since few women ever pass 40, maximum fascination can continue indefinitely. – Christian Dior
The F Word. Forty. I’m turning 40 tomorrow. Believe it or not, I’m kind of excited. My 30s were much better than the 20s, so hopefully I’ll just get wiser and more fabulous. So fabulous that I’m throwing myself a party–a goofy super self-indulgent party, but that’s what happens when you turn 40 right? You quit caring more about others judgments and live the best life possible. At least that’s what I’m telling myself.
Reality is, there are some downsides.
- Getting older does not appear to be pain free. Jeepers, I’ve already had hip surgery, it’s probably not going to get better.
- Sensible shoes (see point #1).
- I’m going to start using words like jeepers.
- Suddenly, KT Oslin songs have started making sense to me. Her biggest album “Songs from an Aging Sex Bomb.” Did I ever even get to be a sex bomb? Jeepers.
- Using a KT Oslin reference.
- Not being able to find any other songs about being in my 40s. Jon Conlee’s “The Backside of 30″ is the closest I could find. And it’s not exactly positive. ”20 Years Ago” from Kenny Rogers? Bummer. The Who’s “My Generation?—I hope I die before I get old??” Um, no.
- During the next 10 years, all 3 of my kids will leave for college (hopefully)–this still makes me wistful.
- When I’m 46, my dad will be gone from my life longer than he was in it—this makes me very wistful.
There are things I’m appreciating about being 40
- Being comfortable in my own skin—seriously, this is what I look like and it’s not going to get better (or worse, thanks to Miss Clairol, Botox and Restalyn). Might as well quit beating myself up and embrace my aging sex bomb.
- Not being scared of taking chances and failing. I will try out for more plays and attempt more schooling. I won’t cry if I don’t make it in, and won’t cry if I get in and can’t handle it. Of course, being a confident, mature 40 something, I bet I kick ass.
- Making new friends and cleaning out the closet on those relationships that just don’t work for me. Life is too short—if I’m on the downside of the hill, I’m not going to waste precious moments on those that hold me back. Luckily, I don’t have many of those people in my life. The universe pretty much gifted me with a circle of wonderful family and friends.
- All 3 of my kids will leave for college (hopefully).
- Enjoying private time with my hubby(please see bullet above). We only spent one year before kids—the empty nest will be a new adventure (please see bullet #1, second section).
- One word: Cougarrific. Oh, I’m just kidding. Or am I? In my 40s, I plan to be kind of mysterious.
- Throwing myself parties, which are really to celebrate all those wonderful people around me. Those wonderful people who will selflessly indulge me by wearing berets and speaking in bad French accents to help me celebrate turning 40.
It is sad to grow old but nice to ripen.
Brigitte Bardot
The real F word for me at this point? Fantastic.

5 comments
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January 4, 2012 at 1:15 PM
Suzann
You always were soooo funny and talented. I am so glad to see you haven’t changed a bit. Have a great birthday. Love ya, girl. HUGS!
January 4, 2012 at 1:39 PM
Kirsten
This is wonderful. Thanks for giving me permission (even though I know I don’t need it, I still kinda do) to embrace my aging sex bomb. Happy 40th to you!
January 4, 2012 at 1:56 PM
Carol Anne Long
You are AWESOME! Here’s a little something for you to do in your spare time this year: write a book. PLEASE!!! You are so funny and smart and talented, and really, we should be paying to read what you have to say – you shouldn’t just let us read it for free. You make 40 look pretty amazing; I think I’m actually looking forward to my own 4-0. Happy, happy birthday, and much love!
January 4, 2012 at 2:27 PM
Christopher
The forties are when all the questions start getting answered! Welcome to the club.
January 4, 2012 at 4:48 PM
gilzil
Love you. I Hope you have a fabulous indulgent birthday party – and i’m sad to miss it. And I just thought of another song up your alley – My next 30 years by Tim McGraw (i know you are forty, but you can still have your next 30 years, right?)